Jennifer Lopez, the multi-talented singer and actress, candidly reflected on love, relationships, and self-discovery during her first appearance on SiriusXM’s Howard Stern Show on Wednesday, October 15.
When asked by Howard Stern if she has truly been loved, Lopez paused before answering, “No,” though she acknowledged that she has experienced the depth of truly loving someone else. She explained, “What I learned, it’s not that I’m not lovable — it’s that they’re not capable… They gave me what they had. They gave me all of it, every time. All the rings, all the things I could ever want. The houses, the rings, the marriage. All of it. But…”
Lopez reflected that part of her struggle in relationships stemmed from not loving herself at the time. Having been married and divorced four times, including her most recent marriage to Ben Affleck, and sharing 17-year-old twins Max and Emme with ex-husband Marc Anthony, she admitted that her pursuit of love sometimes became overwhelming. “I was ready to destroy myself just to feel loved again,” she said, calling it an addiction she had to confront.
The star credits her last divorce as a turning point. “It was the best thing that ever happened to me because it really made me journey into… I had a religious coach, a therapist, a couple’s therapist, an individual therapist, a coach to understand addiction. I had everything. I was like, ‘I’m gonna figure this out if it kills me.’”
Lopez emphasized that the core of her growth came from within. “Now I’m able to sit here in a much more self-assured, self-aware way… and know who I am and just really appreciate that person,” she said. “I feel really comfortable and good in being myself, all the good parts and all the kind of complicated things.”
Although she has glimpses of this connection with others, Lopez stressed that her journey is ultimately about self-love. Stern noted that he wished for her to find that fully realized love, to which she responded with gratitude.
Affleck, who reunited with Lopez at the New York City premiere of her new film Kiss of the Spider Woman, previously spoke about their divorce, emphasizing that there was no scandal or intrigue. “It’s just a story about people trying to figure out their lives and relationships in ways that we all sort of normally do,” Affleck told GQ in March.
Kiss of the Spider Woman is now playing in theaters, marking another milestone in Lopez’s storied career, even as she continues to navigate the personal journey of love and self-acceptance.
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